Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Hot Man Haiku #7

Fucking commercials
Ten Thirty Diet Coke Break
Damn, now I'M thirsty!

Tuesday, February 27, 2007


So a woman was convicted of defrauding the government by coaching her kids on how to fake mental retardation.


She started when they were young, and got tons of social security money out of the deal by having her kids "fake it" with social workers. The boy was still faking being challenged up until he was in his mid 20's!

How did they get busted? The boy went to traffic court to contest a ticket, and he did so VERY lucidly. And it was caught on camera. I remember seeing this story several months back when the video aired on some news channel (probably Entertainment Tonight or something).

Rumor has it when asked how she got the idea, the mom evidently said, "Well, after seeing that Corky kid on Life Goes On I figured if he could do it, so could my kids."

Monday, February 26, 2007

What in Gay Hell was she thinking?

Text conversation during the Oscars:

Kyle: Just saw Jennifer Hudson. What in gay hell is she wearing?

cb: She hates gay people, so we got our revenge by making her wear that.

Life in Hell

I really just need to stop going out on the weekends. Or at least going out with my buddy Frank.

It was Frank & Co.'s big idea to go out to this club called Hell in Chapel Hill this past Saturday night. According to Frank- every second and fourth saturdays of the month, Hell hosts a huge dance party that is a big hit with the gays. These dance parties were purported to be slighly mixed with straights, but very friendly-- AND the crowd was said to be 30-somethings.

One of our friends (an ex I call Richard the 2nd) even met a "hot" guy at the last dance party and they managed to go out on a date!! According to Frank, this guy (named James) was "just my type" and Frank wanted to set me up with him (more on Richard's date with this guy in a minute)

Even though I am highly skeptical of anything Frank says is fun (he IS after all currently dating someone less than half his age) I allowed myself to be sucked in. I agreed to go- mainly because I really needed a night out after a month of not leaving my house. So I got all dolled up, plucked and tweazed myself into a stupor, and donned my best "Kum & Go" hat. Damnit, I was ready.

So we arrived at Hell promptly at 10:45 (EARLY!) so as to avoid the HUGE line that would surely be forming in the next 15 minutes or so. We of course are able to head right down the stairs and to the ID check area.

Immediately I'm struck by the feeling that something is amiss. It was the music. It was definitely not gay-bar-ish at all. The DJ (if you can call him that) was spinning funk/soul music. Don't get me wrong, I actually APPRECIATED this, as I don't tend to like the thumpa-thumpa shit. But I knew at that point that strange things were afoot at the Circle K.

Then we walk in. The early crowd was a mix of collegiate girls fresh from some sort of sorority gathering, 80's hair band rocker wannabes, and many MANY men with mullets.

I am not exaggerating.

The ensuing conversation went something like this:

cb: Um, Frank- I don't think this is a gay dance party atmosphere.

frank: Its still early. This place will be PACKED by 12.

cb: Yeah, but packed with WHAT? Frank, I haven't seen this many mullets since the last Indigo Girls concert.

frank: Trust me. Lets go play some airhockey.

So we began drinking and playing air hockey. And then foosball. And true to his word, the bar did begin to fill up... with college kids. Oh, and two white guys dressed as black rappers from the 80's replete with the Louis Vuitton baseball caps kicked sideways.


Around this time Richard spilled the beans on his date with this "hot" guy from the last Hell dance party. James, as it turns out, does not have a car or a driver's license. He also evidently doesn't have two nickels to rub together as when he went to get money so that he could pay for dinner, the ATM ate his card. This is the guy that is evidently "just my type".

And so I kept drinking-- but the bar didn't get any gayer. Or better. Frank finally came back to our group after a bathroom trough visit and admitted to us that evidently the gay dance party had been cancelled in favor of the fresh hell that we were currently mired in. How festive for me!

Looking around, I began to feel very old. It was as if I had somehow stumbled into the past to a scene that I was familiar with but no longer a part of. Like a "Big Chill" or "St. Elmo's Fire" in joke that I just didn't grok. The whole thing was a stew of bad hair, big glasses, tight jeans, cigarette smoke and drunk children. In short, it sucked. Thus, I naturally opted for my best bitchy attitude and wore it for the rest of the time there.

frank (while groping and kissing on his 12 year old boyfriend): cb, you don't look like you are having any fun.

cb: Gosh frank- why ever would you say that?

frank: C'mon-- there are some cute guys here.

cb: Hmmm, yes. Cute. In that "Hey, I just got hair down there" sort of way. Plus they are all straight.

frank: cb, just enjoy it. Its a fun scene!

cb: Frank, this is so completely not my scene. In fact, I don't think you could have found a scene that was more ANTI my scene than this scene. Next time how about we crash a dance party of naked, lesbian pygmy cannibals. Atleast then I'd have death to look forward to.

frank: So, you're ready to go then?

(cb gives frank his best 'withering' look)

Needless to say, I didn't join Frank & Co for the post club, late night eats.

Sunday, February 25, 2007


Behold Magnum! I cut his hair yesterday.

Background: Ok, so Kyle over at stagerightstageleft works for a prominent hair product manufacturer. They do other stuff too, but a lot of it revolves around hair. And they have all these fake 'practice' heads lying about. In fact, Kyle blogged about ordering these heads (I need 10 Kates, 5 Mellissas,etc)- he also spoke about carting them around in a bag.

One time I got a box from him- probably for my birthday- and inside, among other things, was one of these heads. This particular head is called Magnum. When I received him, he looked like Jesus-- only shaggier. I wish I had taken a "before" picture for contrast- but perhaps Kyle will post one for me. Truly his hair was like a foot long and his beard was many inches long. Uggh. NOT a good look to be sure.

Fast Forward: So this head sits in my closet for months. But recently I got Magnum out in order to train a baseball cap. And after all this cap training, Magnum looked rough. He had hat hair galore, and he was looking rather nappy. Which reminded me that I myself was getting nappy-- so I cut my hair yesterday.

And when I finished cutting my hair, I realized that I just HAD to do something with my little buddy's hair too. So I sat on the edge of my bathtub and started in on his head.

Let me just say that it was HARD cutting that much hair with a pair of dimestore scissors and a pair of wahl clippers. That and the fact that the head isn't attached to anything. I think that for real students, the heads are supported on a stand or something. I had to hold his head between my knees while I was trying to comb out the tangles (evidently Mr. Magnum hadn't ever heard of a brush).

I basically just hacked away at the long mane until it was a manageable length. Then I washed his hair-- ok, so really I just got it wet-- after the preliminary cut so that i could better comb it and try that whole comb-it-and-hold-it-between-your-fingers-to-cut-it thing. Yeah, that didn't work so much.

So I freehanded it. And these pictures show my results. Not bad huh? Its a bit Barry Gibb, updated to at least the early 90's in style. With no training I managed to take his hair from 1 BC to 1990 AD. And Magnum kinda got hot, didn't he?

Now I have something to practice kissing on...

Friday, February 23, 2007

Live. Die. Kill.

An interesting segment on NPR the other day posed the question: What would you live for? What would you die for? What would you kill for?

So naturally I'm co-opting this and putting it on my blog. I need answers people. GOOD answers. And to start the ball rolling, here are mine:

Live for: finding that perfect man who's a blend'a Paul Bunyan, Saint Pat, and Noah Webster... with a ten inch penis of course.

Die for: A martini as dry as the sahara

Kill for: the right amount of money--say 2.5 million dollars or so.

But a close runner up in the kill for column is this motorcycle:

The colorscheme is Nuclear Blue and Molten Orange. How hot is THAT?

Thursday, February 22, 2007

Attack of the Rainbows

Ok, so yesterday must have been Rainbow Day or something. Not only did I see one in the morning when I arrived at work (created by the newly risen sun), but I also got to see one on the way home from work made by the setting sun.

As I was driving home, I encountered a light, misty rain shower-- but the sky was clear to the west. So I looked east and lo! A beautiful rainbow was keeping pace with me as I drove.

And this rainbow was extraordinarily bright and well defined. Not only that, due to the angle of the sun and the proximity of the rain shower, it appeared as if this particular rainbow was coming right down to the ground about 50 yards away from my vehicle. No pot of gold was visible, but I didn't get out of my vehicle to properly check.

This rainbow was close though! I swear that I saw this rainbow pass in front of more distant trees and houses and such during my drive, and I was able to view said objects THROUGH the colors of the rainbow. Very bizarre!

When you stop to think of the physics behind the light refraction when sunlight and water droplets align just so... well, rainbows are a pretty fucking cool phenomenon.

Not that I'm gonna get all rainbowy-unicorny on y'all.

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Hot Man Haiku #24

hot TV drama
scruffy with a Brit accent
you like getting drilled?

Random quick musings

We are going through a very shitty audit at work right now-- if I still have a job by the end of the week I'll be lucky. Depending of course on how you define lucky.

American Idol sux.

Saw a rainbow on the way to work this morning-- sun was just coming up and it created a lovely half rainbow in the western sky.

Had a very good piano lesson last night-- probably because I jacked off about 30 minutes before it so I was all relaxed.

Its in the mid 60's here today and it nearly feels like spring outside.

Monday, February 19, 2007

All hail V Ger!

What the FUCK?

Seriously girl, you look like the bald chick from the first Star Trek movie. You know, the one where she becomes the human voice of V Ger (the omnipowerful Voyager space probe).


Someone needs to rip out her uterus so that she can't procreate anymore. We don't need her genes contaminating the pool.

Allah help me...

I've been in the south too freakin' long.

I actually watched the last 40 laps of (and enjoyed!) the Daytona 500 yesterday. It was fraught with wrecks and drama-- including a 2 lap shootout to the finish line that ended with a 0.02 second victory and most of the field wiping out in a flurry of crashes. One guy even finished the race skidding across the finish line on his roof- sparks flying, fire burning! Boogety Boogety Boogety!

Most of the top drivers had shitty days including but not limited to: Jeff Gordon, Tony Stewart, Dale Jr., Kurt Busch, etc. What a wild start to the beginning of the NASCAR season.

And how sad is it that I KNOW this?

I can't believe I'm actually a NASCAR watcher. Not a fan per se, mainly because I still feel comfortable using phrases like 'per se'. But I do have a driver that I pull for (Kasey Kahne)- as well as my old standby (i.e. hot daddy) Bobby Labonte.

Gawd- the next step will be putting wheels on my house and a toilet bowl planter in my front yard.

Sunday, February 18, 2007

My Windowbox

has a chia pet.

Well... technically it isn't a Chia product. Its called "Grow-a-Head". I got it as a stocking stuffer for christmas from my father (or stepmother). My step-bro JJ got one too. JJ's has a face that is a bit blockier- which evidently mimics his head according to stepmom. Mine has the longer, thinner face-- which once again mimics my countenance according to her.

I promised I'd try to grow it. And wouldn't you know that the fucking thing has just taken right off. I actually had to give him a 'haircut' the other day.

Its ironic I'm cutting L'il CB's hair, as i've been cutting my own for years now.

Saturday, February 17, 2007

Guilty Pleasures

I've said it before, and I'll say it again... Randy Orton is FUCKING HOT!

Last night I found myself vegging at home, and what did I find on TV? WWE. World Wrestling Entertainment. It is truly a guilty pleasure of mine, and I love the mindless entertainment value of it all. Well, that and the abundance of Man Candy.

It was truly a fleshfest last night, as John Cena, Randy Orton, the Edge, and Battista were all featured at one point or another. Oh, to be in a Cena/Orton sandwich (while giving Batista a reach-around)!

The best part of the evening though, came in one of the first matches where this Irish guy was fighting "The Boogeyman".

The boogeyman is a voodoo priest type guy that eats worms and wears leather trousers. Fun! Anyway, he's getting his ass handed to him by the Irish guy. And then at one point in the match, while the Irish guy is distracting the ref, in jumps "little bastard" who is a dwarf wrestler dressed as a leprechaun. Little Bastard starts beating on the Boogeyman with a shillely.

Then out of nowhere, in rushes a "Little Boogeyman"! Another dwarf dressed identically to the big boogeyman- right down to the face paint and leather drawers- slides into the ring and attacks Little Bastard with a flying tackle!

When the dwarves started going at it, I nearly spewed milk from my nose it was so fucking funny! And I wasn't even drinking milk!

Needless to say, this turns the tide, and the Boogeyman wins. Then both Boogey and Little Boogey celebrate by downing some live earthworms. All the while the announcers are spewing forth commentary on what just happened. One was in disbelief and kept saying, "Where did little Boogeyman come from?" And then he said "Its like I'm seeing double!"

To which the other announcer quickly quipped, "Actually its like you are seeing one and a half."

I completely lost my shit with that. Kyle at StageRight can attest to this, as I called him in near hysterics and had to relay the whole event to him.

Friday, February 16, 2007

My speakers at work...

I call this one "Hello Sunni".

And this one is "Hello Hindi!"

They are separated by my computer so that no conflicts arise.

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Another Cadet update

God, you would think that I'm a big freakin' Cadets fan with my focus on them in my blog. I'm not really a 'fan' per se, but I am excited by the prospect of their show (except for the title which is still stupid as hell).

They are also generating excitement with me by posting audio clips of what they are performing. The latest is a very jazzy production called Blue Shades by Frank Ticheli that you can hear here. The only unfortunate thing about this piece of music is that Santa Clara Vanguard performed it back in 1999, and they rocked the fucking stadium with it. Cadets take will be cleaner- but probably less in your face. And SCV's drill along with this music was out of sight!

If you can get past the annoyingly pervasive Dr. Beat driving the tempo through the whole clip, the rest of the music is pretty cool. They are sounding good and I'm very curious about their show.

Ah-- only 3.5 months until Drum Corps season!

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Top Ten Disney Villainesses

In honour of the anniversary of St. Valentine's death, I decided to do a top ten listing of my favourite Disney animated villains--- which just so happen to be villainesses (mostly). After all, Disney films are responsible for perpetuating the myths of 'happily ever after' and 'true love'. So here we go...

1) The Sea Witch. She was bad ass AND had a showstopping musical number. And she kept shriveled merpeople as a garden. Ew.

2) Wicked Stepmother from Cinderella. She defines the awful stepmonster roll.

3) Maleficient from Sleeping Beauty. She morphs into a dragon for christ's sake, how fucking cool is that?

4) Wicked Witch from Snow White. Must give her props for the apple trick and the talking mirror.

5) Medusa from the Rescuers. When she tells Penny the orphan "now why would anyone want to adopt an ugly little girl like you?" You just want to claw her eyes out.

6) Cruella deVil. Sort of a comical evil, she nonetheless was trying to turn dalmatians into a coat. Not cool.

7) Captain Hook. Classic villain. And a pirate!

8) Gaston from Beauty and the beast. He got musical numbers too, and he was fucking hot. But still evil.

9) Shan Yu the Hun (from Mulan). Mongolian BEEF! And he killed and burned villages, but survived an avalanche.

10) Jafar from Aladdin. Fey, but not as fey as Scar. Got a musical number. Probably fucked his parrot.

Honourable Mention: the hunter in Bambi. Even though you never see him, that shot ringing out and the silence afterward is absolutely chilling.

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

You know why they call it a cunt?

Because thats the sound it makes when you KICK it.

Here's a short list of people I'd like to kick in the cunt (regular or man):

My big boss (for making my life hell)
George Bush (for polar bears everywhere)
Dick Cheney (because I think he'd enjoy it)
Karl Rove (twice!)
Al Franken (because he's full of himself)
Nora Jones (seriously-- why is she popular?)
Jerry Falwell (THIS is what the wrath of God will feel like)
Osama Bin Laden (no justification required)
Katie Kouric (because of that goddamn smile)
Kim Jong Il (he needs a good attack from the south)
Sandra Day O'Conner (just for fucking leaving the court)
Scooter Libby (who's leaking NOW bitch?)
Jennifer Lopez (lets face it- she just deserves it)
Dame Judy Dench (the facial expression would be priceless, I'm sure)
Henry Kissinger (just because)
Bill Gates (for vista)
Donald Trump (and I'd keep kicking until his hair messed up)
Angelina Jolie (for wearing blood around her neck)
Rev. Al Sharpton (because its black history month)
Condi Rice (because its black histor-ectemy month!)
Ann Coulter (I'd wear steel toe boots and use BOTH feet)
Halle Berry (just to kick the oscar up there...)
Jodie Foster (to see if she'd talk like Nell after)

Monday, February 12, 2007

Depression Spiral

I can feel a melancholy coming on.

At this point I'm attributing it to several factors: cold weather, not working out, getting fat, my detestable job, working weekends, being alone, etc. I'm just in a 'blah' place again and I need to shake it.

My weekend was very uneventful. I worked a shitload on saturday, then did my taxes. The one bright spot was that I was supposed to have a 'booty call' on Saturday... only he never did call.

Thus my Saturday night was spent eating bon-bons and watching Saturday Night Live. And Mad TV (which is better). Oh, and reading a shitty gay pirate novel.

Sunday was much the same-- nothing much to report. I tried whoring online, but to no avail. I didn't even work on music composition this weekend-- other than banging out some crap on the piano.

Just another blah weekend in a series of blah weekends.

Oh, and I guess being single for a 5th Valentine's Day in a row probably has something to do with this too.

Saturday, February 10, 2007

Wait Wait Don't Tell Me...

I listen to NPR. A lot.

Whenever I'm in my car (and not on a long trip with my iPod) I turn on NPR. I really enjoy "All Things Considered" and the news of course. And there is nothing quite as nice as hearing a british accent doing the BBC World News report. And Car Talk rocks. Splendid Table is interesting. (I do hate Prairie Home Companion though... fuck Garrison Keillor. Fuck him right in the ear!)

And then there's Wait Wait Don't Tell Me.

I love this show! It usually makes me laugh out loud in my car, so much so that other drivers give me odd looks. I have a soft spot for topical geopolitical humor. And they always have good commedians and interesting guest stars.

Today they had Paula Poundstone on-- MAN is she quick witted! She was johnny on the spot with so many timely quips that I was rolling out of my bucket seat! Seriously, the woman is fucking funny! And so is the host announcer Peter Sagal.

When they were riffing on a bit about the republicans bashing Pelosi for wanting a big plane so that she could get to Californina with no stops, Paula jumped in with "well if she would consider wearing a diaper during the flight, I bet she could make it without stopping..."


Later on during the quiz portion, Peter was riffing on how FOX news was trying to discredit Barak Obama because he smokes the occasional cigarette but keeps that a secret. His main rebuttal to Fox news was that he was enjoying the occasional marlboro red-- and not smoking black tar heroine out of the skull of a dead puppy.

I about shit myself at the imagery! That type of quick wit really cracks me up.

Friday, February 09, 2007

Worst. Novel. Ever.

This book should have been titled My Worst Novel.

What is it with gay fiction? Why does it suck so? Why can't I find a decent gay novel, or at the very least, a decent gay novel that doesn't revolve around AIDS? I realize that the disease is of great cultural significance, but it seems to provide the dramatic tension in like 98% of all gay fiction. And 100% of all nonfiction (not like anyone reads nonfiction anyway).

There is a serious dearth of good gay novels out there (in my opinion). Oh sure, every once in awhile you get Holloran putting out a good one-- or there's Maupin for those gayer "Valley of the Dolls" type romps. But mostly the literary pool seems littered with "harlequin romance" style stories that just happen to involve gay pirates and their 'manhoods'.

Or worse- the whole "Men on Men FRICTION volume 7- True Tales of Nasty Locker Rooms" genre.

I like novels where the gay thing is more of an undercurrent. Like when you know the main character is probably gay and has a huge crush on a guy, but it is never realized. Or if it is, then things fall apart. You know... real life shit.

I am sure that I've read some good gay novels in the past few years- but no titles are ringing a bell. And this is sad because I have a LOT of books (I read quite a bit) and I have an entire shelf of gay or pseudo-gay themed books at home. But I draw a blank when trying to remember a good one.

Are there any good gay novels out there? Suggestions welcomed.

Thursday, February 08, 2007

Hot man Haiku #133

God on a surfboard
undulating rhythmic waves
hang ten on my face

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

First Kisses

I have no idea what fucking commercial I saw last night, but it prompted me to think about first kisses. And naturally I'm going to tell y'all about them right now.

FIRST EVER KISS (consiously): Her name was Missy Carter and she was my best friend at the time. We were probably around 5 or 6 years old, perhaps as old as 7. We were playing in the basement of my house while our moms had coffee and bars upstairs. While jumping up and down on an old love seat, we decided that we should kiss. It was brief, but full on the lips. We then squealed with delight and thought that since we kissed on a love seat, this meant that we had to get married! Immediately we ran up and told our moms what we had done.

FIRST REAL GIRL KISS: Junior year of high school. Prom date. Her name was Lisa something-or-other. I'm amazed that I could even get to her lips, as her fully crenalined poufy dress should have kept me well away. I walked her to her door, and we said our good nights. And then I leaned... she leaned... and we kissed for maybe a minute. We broke up shortly thereafter so she could date a hotter guy. The kiss was wholly unmemorable- other than the butterflies I felt in my stomach about the whole thing.

FIRST REAL GUY KISS: First year of grad school. His name was Craig James and he was a senior in undergrad (ex gymnast). I had a huge crush on him and we had become close friends. I was in his dorm room the night before spring semester began (January whateverth). We had talked for hours and my crush on him was eventually revealed. I got up to leave (in utter embarassment) and he pulled me back down onto his dorm room couch and he kissed me. I remember having my socks completely knocked off- feeling stubble, and his tongue. The kiss made me dizzy.

Now I want to hear about all y'all's kisses.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Hot man Haiku #44

Tight-End, Iowan
You just won the superbowl!
And captured my heart

Monday, February 05, 2007

Who doesn't love DiC?

Enough said.

Sunday, February 04, 2007

Whoring for Watches

Ok, so it was an interesting day yesterday. After a half-assed week, I went in to work on Saturday and put in 7 insanely productive hours. Then I did some music composition at one of my favorite coffee houses. THEN I met my friend Frank for dinner. (You remember Frank-- tragic decorating taste, tacky ornament party,etc)

Well, Frank (before we went to Chili's) wanted me to see the 'new' TJ Maxx. New means they are evidently attempting to upscale things a bit- especially in the jewelry department. It has been Frank's best kept secret, but no more. He told me to meet him there first. Chili's is right next door after all. Naturally.

While walking around the watch case and waiting for Frank to arrive, my eye was bedazzled by the following:

I was capitvated instantly (I do have a stong watch fetish after all). However, looking at some prices of the surrounding watches (many in the hundreds of dollar range) I was disheartened. I thought this was supposed to be a discount store?

Frank finally arrived and explained the machinations of TJ Maxx to me. The nice watch case had all the watches that were at only SLIGHTLY marked down prices. The far case had the INSANELY marked down watches. My watch just happened to be in the insane case.

So I asked the shopgirl if I could see it and by chance how much it was. This particular watch (box and all) had been marked down several times and was finally set at $175.00. I've routinely paid over $250 for watches before, so I thought-- why the heck not.

So I bought it.

I admit I was not familiar with the "Gevril" name at all. In fact, I could already hear the "Why you wearin' a Gerbil watch?" comments from people. But I didn't care.

Its beautiful. And its automatic movement. And the back is clear so you can SEE the movement. And it has a fancy double clasp with a pushbutton trigger opening. And it is heavy as lead. So I start looking at the watch more closely-- especially the price tag.

Underneath all the marked down stickers, etc, I finally unearthed the original tag. Evidently the watch had been marked down quite a bit. Before the 175 it was 250. Before that it was 3-something. Before that, 499. And sometime before that it was quite a bit more.


So I did some online searching. Evidently these gerbil watches go for a grand or more. Can this be true???? Granted, even online they get marked down so that they are only 1/2 price or so at some of the overstock warehouses, etc. And I don't care if mine is a fake, because if it is- it looks like a good one.

Isn't he gorgeous? Today I go to get links taken out by a jeweler so that it fits ever-so-elegantly against my waifish wrist.

Saturday, February 03, 2007

Who's the boss?

I'm the fucking boss! That's right, for Xmas i got a cool gift from K-dog at 'stageright, etc' of these cube people. Its really a cube playset. I have bob, ann, eve, carl? and some corporate zombies, etc. And some cubes as well. When i was sick this week, I decorated the cubes to make my peeps places a bit more personalized.

Here we see Eve giving some corporate zombies a refreser course in sexual harrassment. Evidently its NOT ok to offer or spontaneously give your coworkers shoulder massages. Or IS it?

Bob's rather despondent. He has to see that fucking More Production poster every fucking day. I know how you feel, bob.

In this picture I think you really get a sense of Ann's fetish for cats--I love the 'hang in there' poster. And Carl just loves that 'successory' poster!

What a bunch of pathetic fuckers, right? Too bad I modeled it almost exactly from where I work (minus the jesus calendars).

Groundhog Day

I spent Groundhog Day at home because I spent Groundhog's Eve heaving up my guts.

Yes, I spent most of thursday night with a blistering headache and vomiting violently about every hour on the hour. Toward the end, I was mostly just dry heaving. At one point I was heaving so hard that I was convinced that my stomach was forming a rift in the space/time continuum.

So I stayed home from work on Friday.

I watched a couple flicks-- Romancing the Stone and (of course) Groundhog Day. I love both films.

Romancing the Stone is just a perfect action/adventure romance movie and the direction by Zemekis is brilliant. So is the chemistry between douglas and turner. What a gay romp it is- and the scene where they kiss for the first time on teh dancefloor at the fiesta with the fireworks going off in the background gets me every time.

Groundhog Day is such a great concept- and I love how he finally uses his time to become a better person (doctor, musician, philanthropist, good guy). However, my favorite scene is when he abducts Punxatawney Phil and goes on a high speed chase with him. When he admonishes Phil with the "Don't drive angry!" I laugh every time.

Of course, laughing after you've heaved up everything is not highly recommended.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Snow Day

The forecast today was for a "wintery mix" throughout the central and northcentral part of North Carolina today. Thus, its a madhouse.

All schools closed for today- and this was announced last night. This was based on the 'threat' of snow and ice for today. So far, when I left for work around 6:45 am, it wasn't doing shit.

Then about 8 am, it snowed here at work... for 30 whole minutes. It barely showed up on the grass. Then it quit. And of course now it isn't doing anything, no sleet, no rain, no nothing.

Thank goodness the kiddies are out of school and safe. I mean, those clouds sure are scary-looking... like they might cause trouble.

People go absolutely nutters down here if snow gets mentioned- literally a panic ensues. There is a run on the grocery stores for bread and milk (sometimes eggs too). I'm not kidding; there will be no bread or milk in any of the grocery stores now. Its as if everyone in the state got a sudden craving for french toast or something.

What a mess. But better to be safe than sorry like 2 years ago when we got about a half inch of snow and it paralyzed Raleigh. Kids were honest to God spending the night at their schools because parents and schoolbuses couldn't get them home.

How embarassing.