Monday, April 02, 2007

the Nazi strikes again

So my little boss (I have two bosses technically... my immediate supervisor whom I'll call "little boss" and the evil overlord whom I'll call "big bossy") came into my office first thing today with a directive coming from Big Bossy. I was directed to remove all "offensive material" from my office.

I asked him, "What, praytell, is this "offensive material"?"

This material, as it turns out, was Happy Bunny.

I had a flip book on my desk of Happy Bunny phrases. My favorite of which was "Since you're gross, shouldn't you be smart?" This evidently qualifies as offensive material in the esteemed robot overlord's eyes (may Allah smile on her forever).

So I removed it.

And then I looked at my Hello Kitty speakers-- could be offensive to Muslims and Hindus... so I took them down.

I also had a Magic 8 ball on my desk (but since this speaks of the Occult, it may be offensive to the christians that I work with, so I took that away too.

Then there was my "Successories" calendar that I put up as a joke. Personally I find these platitudes offensive, so I removed that.

The pictures of the Hurricane's winning the Stanley Cup? Gone. After all, i work with a lot of Red Wing fans... they could be offended by the Canes hoisting the trophy.

I ended up pulling everything down.

And then posting a sign on my door. The sign reads:

Caution! Now entering a sterile* work environment.

And in tiny type at the bottom of the page:
*Any personal items, fun material, and/or instances of individuality should be reported immediately.


At 9:34 AM, Anonymous Zack said...

Sounds like Big Bossy has too much time on her hands. And I find that offensive.

At 11:40 AM, Blogger Gay Canuck in the Capital said...

Hello Kitty speakers? What a bottom. ;)

At 6:37 PM, Anonymous Kevin said...

I would hang a poster sized picture of her and ask her if that was offensive also. Sort of a no win situation for boss lady!


At 7:57 PM, Blogger A-Ron said...

I love you because you posted happy bunny. I used to collect the stickers to humor my blackened little heart. :-)

At 8:13 PM, Anonymous Ray said...

That's our girl! Bitter through and through.

Start shit bombing the place more often.


At 11:18 PM, Anonymous Jim said...

I had this lesbian woman who worked in my department. She was not my supervisor nor did we have any shared responsibilities. When I went on vacation, I came back to find out that she came into my cubicle and ripped down all my pictures of Richard Hatch and handed them over the my Supervisor and then told her that either she should turn me into HR or she would file a hostile work environment complaint.

Never mind the fact that the whore had a HUGE Georgia O'Keeffe print hung up in her office that resembled a big giant vagina.

When are we all going to learn to just get the fuck along?


At 9:03 AM, Blogger cb said...

I think I would have snuck in some day when SHE wasn't there and drawn a clit on the o'keefe print.

At 4:23 PM, Blogger Donnie said...

I would've done the same thing. I'm known to be VERY passive-aggressive at times. My granma used to love to say to me, "Don't cut off your nose to spite your face".


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