Saturday, December 09, 2006

Glo-ho-ho-bal Warming


People who do this to their home at Christmas should be shot.

For one thing, its completely tacky and ostentatious. For another, it contributes to Global Warming.

Yeah, that's right. I said it. Global Warming. Energy wasters at the holiday really need to be called out and shamed for their wanton power use. Where do they think the electricity comes from-- God? Well it doesn't. It comes mostly from dirty, old, coal-fired power plants. And these people are sucking up the juice like a slutty receptionist at an office christmas party!

Oh for a return to the good ol' days of the Energy Crisis in the 70's. The government really put the fear into us and effectively stopped huge holiday lighting displays. People started purchasing more fuel efficient vehicles. Americans were actually conscientious about being wasteful.

But not now. Not even with $3 gallons of gas- we still waste.

Here is a quote from my college answering machine greeting, circa 1990. I always tried to come up with clever messages, and this one shows that I was aware of our current situation more than 15 years ago:

(sung to the tune of "Gloria In Excelsis Deo")

Because we chop down the rainforest, we have thrown the world askew
The ice at the north pole is melting, because of too much CO2...

Glo-oh-oh-oh-oh, Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-obal warming
soon we'll all be toast...

Glo-oh-oh-oh-oh, Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-obal warming
soon we'll all be to-oh-oast.

Try to stay cool this Christmas, everyone.

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